A Question for da Ladiez...

GoNzO · 02:34 PM

This is the reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeemix, to SuAZN's thread.

Serious question though-
Why can't you, girls, tell us what you really want?!

All the time my girlfriend says "get me whatever you want."

- Or -

"I don't know- what do you think we should do?"

-TELL US WTF YOU WANT!! Make it easier on us, and on you. That way, u get what u want... and we get what we want

(U guys know what I mean) ...lol, naw just kidding about that last part.
But seriously, it'd be better to help us out rather than -not.

bgirlkatastrophe · 07-11-2007, 02:37 PM

We don't want to spell it out for you...that is why the girls need to get better at giving direct hints...like...wow, I really would like to have that for my birthday. It is no fun if we say...get us this.

LOL Good Luck.

dbaznxdragon · 07-11-2007, 02:51 PM

i'm gonna like this thread

....and why don't girls ever tell us what's wrong? I know alot of girls where they'd rather be mad than fix what the problem is. It even ruins relationships.

fae · 07-11-2007, 03:04 PM

haha i can explain out so much of this... it's really psychological and complicated and cyclical and circular.

the summary:

to why girls don't say what they want:
-they want to see that you pay attention and can come up and know what they like etc...
-they want it to be something that seems like it comes from your thoughtfulness etc... rather than something you've asked them to do.
-it's more romantic
-they don't want to trouble you... obligate you--- a gift out of obligation to females is painful

it goes along with the 'wash the dishes' theory... a girl wants the guy to help with the dishes, but she doesn't want him to do it b/c she's naggin him, she wants him to do it b/c he wants to help etc... so she yells at him telling him to do the dishes, but then she's still not happy b/c he's doing it out of obligation then.

What's wrong?
B/c
-they want you to notice something's wrong and know what you did wrong
-they want you to be ready to hear it: the worst is when they answer that question and then you blow up at 'em... that makes 'em shut down more. they may be anticipating your response, and if they assume it'll go bad, then they won't wanna share it.
-punishment... they want you to FEEL that you've really done something wrong so it's clear
-they like it when you're suddenly nice and trying to fix/resolve it... the way your attention is and attitude is

some/all/a mix of the stuff above is some of it.

etc
etc...

just a lil overview. :]~
CheerZ

Fatalz · 07-11-2007, 03:28 PM

^thats a nice response, is your name CheerZ or something? XD

Id like to put out another question for the gals.
out of couriosity

do girls expect guys to holla at them when theyre with their friends?

Lengsavath · 07-11-2007, 03:38 PM

lol yeah, ive been wondering about that same thing

snoopy8 · 07-11-2007, 03:43 PM

girls are complicated :S

B-boy Jp · 07-11-2007, 03:44 PM

Girls are just tools that give sexual pleasure ^^
lol kidding :P but yeah, what fae said anyway XD

dbaznxdragon · 07-11-2007, 03:46 PM

i think through fae's response...that's y so much women call us dogs...they pretty much treat us like them...with the punishment and all...

but i mean like....guys asking girls what the problem is for why they are acting a certain way..and them beating around the bush, making excuses; or lying and then justifying why they lied.

B-boy Jp · 07-11-2007, 03:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by snoopy8

girls are complicated :S

No its just that... compared to girls... We are handicaped. WE HAVE A NEED To MAKE SENSE ! lol.

fae · 07-11-2007, 03:53 PM

as i said: it's cyclical... the problem stems a response in females, then the way they respond fuels the problem.

the dishwasher theory: the guy wants to help less b/c he's being yelled at to do it... etc. which makes her even more unhappy.

a lot of how women are viewed/treated/and expected to be these days adds to it all... for example, if a women ideally wants to handle relationships in a traditional sense (in terms of relating... how guys and girls relate etc... him being the leader, man, etc... and her being the lady, etc), she may still act in a way that doesn't allow it...

ie: "NO! You're supposed to be the leader!!! SO LEAD!!!" (well... who's actually controlling/leading/commanding?)

With the whole "women be tough" thing too, it all makes it complex...

As to the treating like dogs thing... a lot of time men/women don't realize how each other work: for example, a women can really tear down a man or build him up... say they're out together with a buncha other people/couples... The guy will get major props/respect if his girl admires/is proud of him and being with him... but if she's the type who nags and is embarrassed by or not happy with him, then all the other guys might pity her man or not respect him as much, in a sense (take it w/ a grain of salt... i'm trying to keep this brief and quick--- i'm at work still :] )

As to girls going out together:
it depends, sometimes they are going out with the "GIRLS NIGHT" idea... like... "I'm sick of men and I just want to go hang and be silly and half fun with my GIRLS"... then you better leave 'em alone, or they'll use you as a chew toy.
If, on the other hand, they're like "OMG GIRLS! Let's go find us some men and have fun!"... then it's diff.

Kunoichi Sakura · 07-11-2007, 04:11 PM

simple umbrella answer = girls want you to know everything about them at all times as it shows ur paying attention to what they say and do.

I have no idea how to answer the whats wrong issue.

dbaznxdragon · 07-11-2007, 04:12 PM

Yo fae...you're pretty much right.

PopTrunk · 07-11-2007, 04:22 PM

How do we know what kind of night, 4 girls in the car by the gas pump next to us, on a Saturday night at the gas station, are having? Do u have to talk to them to find out or is there nonverbals?

Is there signs or hints that are dropped?
Because one time we were at Sonic, a drive-in sort of fast food place, where you eat ur food in your car.

Anyway, there was some girls next to us and my friend started talking to them then- we got off and just got in their car and ate with them and everything was cool. LoL.

But at clubs, groups of girls, even if its 2 or 3, they are extremely unapproachable. They have their BITCH radar on HIGH.

...it makes me wanna grab their ass just for rejecting me, since they won't know how did it anyway. Which I did once, and the whore didn't know who it was.

SuAZN · 07-11-2007, 04:25 PM

why dont women tell you what they want and whats wrong and all that?

Simple: they like to be complicated and start drama adn all that shit. Basically, theyve been conditioned to be selfrightious bitches who find it socially acceptable to nag and annoy and start issues and feign for attn...how that happend, i really dont know.

me, im a sucker for communication- within reason. I like for things to be open and would rather hash it out at an appropo time (aka, so no scene is made) than let it all bottle up, u dig? however, i understand that when a guy says nothing is wrong- just to leave it- if hes gonna tell me, hes gonna tell me- if hes not, well, hes not. as for the "whats wrong" if somethings wrong, im liable to say something, if nothings wrong, im gonna say nothing is wrong and mean it- or, if something is wrong and im handeling it already- im just gonna say im handeling it..that kina stuff...

When guys ask me what i want for what ever reason (bday, etc) im liable to say, tho i dont really care either way..simple tho= usually consists of anime/music. lols..
i dont ask for a lot really..iono..then again, im not the average female (not saying that to be concieted or anything)..

as for the "holla when with friends thang.." 1) im usually with guys 2) if i am with females (very rarely) it doesnt matter why im with them, im not gonna treat a guy like shit just because of who im with. I just dont play that.

i dont know if this helps any...but its honest..

btw- fae, you have a better handle of a female perspective and ive witnessed behavior in females like what u mentioned..